11/5/00: Golfing with Houlihan, Relationships

Hi,

I watched "Charlie's Angels" this past weekend and thought that it was very
funny and entertaining. It sort of spoofs/imitates MI2, the Matrix, and
Romeo Must Die. I highly recommend it.

A few friends and I also waited in a line of about 300 people to sign up to
be an extra in "Rush Hour 2", with Jackie Chan. If you're interested in
possibly being an extra in this film, call Background Players (the casting
company) at 310.535.7749. I'll let you know if I get called on to be an
extra.

Most of you probably know that I'm a strong Bush supporter. If you're
still undecided on who to vote for, let me know. I would be happy to share
with you why I'm voting for Bush.

The only response to last week's thought provoking question is Abraham
Lincoln.

This week's thought provoking question is: "If you could work for any
person in the world, who would it be, and what job would you want?"

This week's humor was forwarded from Anna Man. The puzzle is from "The
Ideal Problem Solver". Finally, the inspirational piece was forwarded from
Kelly Chu.

Enjoy!

-Josh.
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Golfing with Houlihan

A golf pro dragged himself into the clubhouse looking as though he'd just
escaped a tornado.
"What's wrong?" a woman asked.
"I just lost a game to Houlihan," the pro said.
"What? But Houlihan's the worst player I've ever seen. How could he have
beaten you?"
"He tricked me," the pro said. "On the first tee, he asked for a handicap.
I told him he could have 30, 40, 50 strokes - any handicap he wanted. He
said, 'Just give me two gotchas.'"
"What's a gotcha?" asked the woman.
"That's what I wanted to know," the pro said. "Houlihan said, 'You'll see.'

Then, as I was teeing off, just as I had my club poised, he screamed out
'Gotcha!'"
"I can guess what happened," the woman said.
"Sure," the pro said. "The scream threw me off, and I missed the ball
completely."

"Understandable," the woman said. "But still, that's only one swing. How
did he win the game?"
The pro answered, "You try swinging at a golf ball while waiting for that
second 'gotcha!'"
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Puzzle: Murder Mystery

A county sheriff arrived at the scene of an apparent homicide and found the
victim lying on the side of the road, dead. The only clue to the crime was
a pair of tire tracks left on the little-traveled dirt road. The sheriff
followed the tracks to a country farmhouse less than a mile away. Although
there were three men sitting on the front porch, the sheriff was certain
that the man he wanted for questioning was sitting in the middle even
though he knew that none of the men had a car and none had mud on their
boots. How did the sheriff know he should question the man sitting in the
middle?
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Reason, Season or Lifetime

People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. When you
figure out which it is, you know exactly what to do.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you
have expressed outwardly or inwardly. They have come to assist you through
a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you
physically, emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend, and
they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then,
without any wrong doing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this
person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up or out
and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has
been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done. The prayer you sent up
has been answered and it is now time to move on.

When people come into your life for a SEASON, it is because your turn has
come to share, grow, or learn. They may bring you an experience of peace
or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They
usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real!
But, only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons; those things you must
build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to
accept the lesson, love the person/people (anyway); and put what you have
learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is
said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

When you receive this e-mail just recite the following prayer.

PRAYER:
May today there be peace within you. May you trust God that you are
exactly where you are meant to be. May you not forget the infinite
possibilities that are born of faith. May you use those gifts that you
have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you. May you be
content knowing that you are a child of God. Let His presence settle into
your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, and to bask in
the sun. It is there for each and every one of you.
______________________________

Last Week's Puzzle Solution: Glasses
(Courtesy of Erik Smith. Quite a few of you sent me similar solutions. I
know it was a bit easy.)

This one is easy, just empty the 2nd glass into the 5th empty glass!