March 3, 2002: If You Can, Small Group

Hi,

When I left Singapore in December, I promised a friend from my small group
(Grace Leong) at the International Baptist Church that I would write an
article for the church's newsletter about my experiences in the Young Adult
small group. Grace has been very diligent in reminding me to write this
article, so I finally sat down this weekend and wrote it. I've attached it
below to encourage all of you to join a small group at church and to help
make it a wonderful place for sharing and growth. For those of you at IBC,
the final version you see printed may not be the same, because I told Grace
that she can edit it as she please.

As I mentioned last week, I will be the best man at my friend Steve Lee's
wedding. I'm starting to plan for the games and activities at the wedding
banquet. So, if you have any ideas or suggestions for any wholesome games,
please send them to me. Thanks in advance for your thoughts!

This week's thought provoking question: "If you could change one thing
about your city or town or neighborhood, what would you alter?"

This week's humor piece was forwarded from Anna Man.

Enjoy!

-Josh.
_________________________________

If You Can

If you can start the day without caffeine or pep pills,
If you can be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains,
If you can resist complaining and boring people with your troubles,
If you can eat the same food everyday and be grateful for it,
If you can understand when loved ones are too busy to give you time,
If you can overlook when people take things out on you when, through no
fault of yours, something goes wrong,
If you can take criticism and blame without resentment,
If you can face the world without lies and deceit,
If you can conquer tension without medical help,
If you can relax without liquor,
If you can sleep without the aid of drugs,
If you can do all these things,

THEN YOU ARE PROBABLY THE FAMILY DOG
_________________________________

Importance of Joining a Small Group

One of the highlights of my short stay in Singapore was my experience with
the Young Adult small group at IBC. My company, Avery Dennison, sent me to
work in Singapore for 8 months. I spent the first two months visiting a
wide variety of churches. The reason I eventually chose to go to IBC was
because I checked out the Young Adult small group (lead by Ting Guevarra)
and liked the folks in the group and the bible studies. I looked forward
to the weekly Wednesday night studies because it gave me an opportunity to
study God's Word in more depth, but also because it was fun to catch up
with people over dinner.

On August 4, 2001, our small group (Ting, Grace, Stein and I) joined with
other small groups to go hiking from MacRitchie Reservoir to Bukit Timah
(highest point in Singapore). It was a beautiful sunny day, and the views
of the reservoir were spectacular. We made the long hike to the top of
Bukit Timah, rested a while, and hiked back down when it started to rain.
We rewarded ourselves by going to dinner at a Japanese restaurant for some
delicious food. It was a great time of bonding!

Towards the end of the summer, several members of our small group, Ting,
Ben, and Andrew all were leaving Singapore. We had several farewell
parties, including a fun BBQ at Andrew's parents' house. After everyone
left, those of us remaining wondered what would happen to the small group.
Luckily, Rich White agreed to lead our group and host it at his spacious
apartment. From that point on, our group grew quickly.

One funny anecdote is that at the last meeting at Ting's place, Miri Lee
commented that with Ting's departure, the small group would be
overwhelmingly male. I told her to pray for Godly women to join the group.
Well, after we started meeting at Rich's place, the number of women grew
rapidly. Now, the small group is heavily female. We commended Miri for
the power of her prayer!

At our weekly small groups, not only did we enjoy the great cooking by
Rich, Sandy and other helpers, we also started to look forward to the
worship time lead by Fleur. During the summer, we went through
"Experiencing God", which was a great series. I think we all learned more
about how to listen better to God's leading in our lives. We followed our
study time with some sharing, prayer, and dessert.

On Sundays after 2nd service, we usually met outside the sanctuary to
gather for lunch. Sometimes we walked to Great World City (GWC), but
occasionally we took cabs to go to restaurants like Nooch on Orchard Road.
One of our more memorable lunches was when a huge group of us went to the
Korean BBQ restaurant in GWC. Quite often we went to watch a movie
together after lunch. Other times, our group went to the Botanical Gardens
for the Sunday afternoon outdoor concerts, and then had dinner together.

A few of the other memorable events include a potluck at my place, and a
potluck / bible study at Melissa's place. Since I was going to be leaving
Singapore, the group bought a cake and threw a surprise going away
celebration for me. I was very touched! I also enjoyed spending some
great bonding time with good friends from the small group Ramon, Susylia,
and Melissa at the Teen Retreat, especially when we went to Sentosa Beach.
Ramon, Audra, and I hung out often with some of our other friends, and had
an awesome trip to Penang, Malaysia together.

It was very sad for me when I left Singapore in mid-December. I still get
emails about what is going on with the small group. I read about the small
group's fun activities over Christmas, and I wished that I could have been
there. I really thank God that He lead me to this small group and for the
friendships, even though I was only in Singapore for a short time. As I
write the paragraphs above, I can't help but to think that it is similar to
the early Christians' fellowship found in Acts 2:42-47.

Thom Corrigan, in his book, "Community Through Small Groups" provides some
definitions of a Christian community.

1. Christian community can be defined as a place where people feel they
belong, where they are accepted, loved, and forgiven.
2. It is a safe place where they are both challenged and encouraged. It is
a place where each person is valued just for showing up, because Christ in
them.
3. Christian community is a place to share joy and laughter, tears and
sorrow. It is a place of healing, a place to receive, grow, and invest our
lives in others.
4. Christian community is a group of people who are connected first to God
through prayer and worship, to others through loving service, and to
themselves through personal-spiritual growth.
5. Healthy community is built on friendship, mutual care, mentoring, and
opportunities for spiritual direction and formation.

Here are some other descriptive words to describe the ideal small group, in
no particular order:

Christ-centered, trust, safety, caring, intimacy, common goals, commitment,
encouraging, edifying, variety, nourishing, willingness to grow, unity,
good leadership, nurturing, prayer, common stage of life, participatory,
fun, loving, accountable, honest, loyal, confidential, forgiving,
practical, worshipful, joyful, supportive, sharing, healthy, attractive,
connecting, accepting, transparency, praying for others, bonding times,
consistency.

Wow, what a powerful group of words! If you are not currently in a small
group that fits some of the words above, here are two things you can do
(there are probably many more):

1. Take the initiative to help your small group become some of the
descriptions above.
2. Join a small group if you're not already in one.

May the Lord lead you to a good small group!

-Joshua Li.