Humor 6/27/99: Why Parents Go Gray & SHMILY

Hi everyone,

I hope your weekend went well. My first week of work was fairly busy.
It feels strange to be back in the working mode after a year of school.
Now I can actually forget about work at nights and on weekends.

This week's thought provoking question is: "If you could teach your
children only one lesson in life, what would it be?"

The humor was forwarded by Jennifer Chin, followed by an inspirational
story forwarded by Anna Man. Enjoy!

-Josh.
_________________________________________

Why Parents Go Gray

The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an
urgent problem with one of the main computers. He dialed the employee's
home phone number and was greeted with a child's whispered, "Hello?"

Feeling put out at the inconvenience of having to talk to a youngster
the boss asked, "Is your Daddy home?"

"Yes", whispered the small voice.

"May I talk with him?" the man asked.

To the surprise of the boss, the small voice whispered, "No."

Wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?"

"Yes," came the answer.

"May I talk with her?"

Again the small voice whispered, "No."

Knowing that it was not likely that a young child would be left home
alone, the boss decided he would just leave a message with the person
who should be there watching over the child. "Is there any one there
besides you?" the boss asked the child.

"Yes," whispered the child, "A policeman."

Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss
asked "May I speak with the policeman?"

"No, he's busy," whispered the child.

"Busy doing what?" asked the boss.

"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman," came the whispered answer.

Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a
helicopter through the ear piece on the phone the boss asked, "What is
that noise?"

"A hello-copper," answered the whispering voice.

"What is going on there?" asked the boss, now alarmed.

In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just
landed the hello-copper."

Alarmed, concerned, and more than just a little frustrated, the boss
asked, "Why are they there?"

Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle...
"They're looking for me."
____________________________

SHMILY (author unknown)

My grandparents were married for over half a century and played their
own special game from the time they had met each other. The goal of
their game was to write the word "shmily" in a surprise place for the
other to find. They took turns leaving "shmily" around the house and as
soon as one of them discovered it, it was their turn to hide it once
more.

They dragged "shmily" with their fingers through the sugar and flour
containers, to await whoever was preparing the next meal. They smeared
it in the dew on the windows overlooking the patio, where my grandma
always fed us warm, homemade pudding with blue food coloring. "Shmily"
was written in the steam left on the mirror after a hot shower, where it
would reappear bath after bath. At one point, my grandmother even
unrolled an entire roll of toilet paper, to leave "shmily" on the very
last sheet. There was no end to the places "shmily" would pop up.
Little notes with "shmily" scribbled hurriedly were found on dashboards
and car seats, or taped to steering wheels. The notes were stuffed
inside shoes and left under pillows. "Shmily" was written in the dust
upon the mantel and traced in the ashes of the fireplace.

This mysterious word was as much a part of my grandparents'' house as
the furniture. It took me a long time before I was able to fully
appreciate my grandparents' game. Skepticism had kept me from believing
in true love...one that is pure and enduring. However, I never doubted
my grandparents' relationship. They had love down pat. It was more
than their flirtatious little games; it was a way of life. Their
relationship
was based on devotion and passionate affection: quick kisses as they
bumped into each other in their tiny kitchen, finishing each other's
sentences, sharing the daily crossword puzzle and word jumble. My
grandma whispered to me about how cute my grandpa was, how handsome and
old he had grown to be. She claimed that she really knew "how to pick
'em." Before every meal they bowed their heads and gave thanks,
marveling at their blessings: a wonderful family, good fortune and each
other.

However, there was a dark cloud in my grandparents' lives: my
grandmother had breast cancer. The disease had first appeared ten years
earlier. As always, Grandpa was with her every step of the way. He
comforted her in their yellow room, painted that way so she could always
be surrounded by sunshine, even when she was too sick to go outside.
Now the cancer was again attacking her body. With the help of a cane
and my grandfather's steady hand, they went to church every morning. My
grandmother grew steadily weaker until, finally, she could not leave the
house anymore. For a while, Grandpa would go to church alone, praying to
God to watch over his wife.

Then one day, what we all dreaded finally happened. Grandma was gone.
"Shmily" was scrawled in yellow on the pink ribbons of my grandmother's
funeral bouquet. As the crowd thinned and the last mourners turned to
leave, my aunts, uncles, cousins and other family members came forward
and gathered around Grandma one last time. Grandpa stepped up to my
grandmother's casket, and, taking a shaky breath, he began to sing to
her. Through his tears and grief, the song came, a deep and throaty
lullaby. Shaking with my own sorrow, I will never forget that moment.
For I knew that, although I couldn't begin to fathom the depth of their
love, I had been privileged to witness its unmatched beauty.

"S-H-M-I-L-Y: See How Much I Love You."
--
_____________________________________

Joshua Li
420 James Road #1
Palo Alto CA 94306
(650)565-8674
Permanent Email: joshli@post.harvard.edu
http://personal.anderson.ucla.edu/joshua.li/