Humor 6/6/99: Car Acronyms & Frogs

Hi everyone,

I spent most of this past weekend working on a strategy paper that all
first year students at the Anderson School had to work on. But I'm
really glad that it's over! One more week of classes and we're done for
the year. I'll be in LA for part of the following week, then I head up
to the bay area.

I'm no longer looking for someone to sublet my room. I'm just going to
move my stuff in storage and look for an apartment when I get back to LA
in the fall. Thanks for sending my request to your friends.

This week's thought provoking question is: "If you could be guaranteed
one thing in life besides money, what would you ask for?"

Since our Lincoln Mercury strategy paper is due tomorrow, this week's
humor is on cars. Notice that Lincoln and Mercury are not even listed.
The humor was forwarded by Neil Shouse, and the inspirational story was
forwarded by Anna Man. Enjoy!

-Josh.
_________________________________________

CAR ACRONYMS

AUDI
Accelerates Under Demonic Influence
Always Unsafe Designs Implemented
All Un-informed Drivers Insulted
All Unnecessary Devices Installed

BMW
Big Money Works
Bought My Wife
Brutal Money Waster

BUICK
Big Ugly Indestructable Car Killer

CHEVROLET
Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips
Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time

DODGE
Damn Old Dirty Gas Eater
Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere

FORD
Fix Or Repair Daily
Found On Road, Dead
Fast Only Rolling Downhill

GM
General Maintenance

GMC
Garage Man's Companion

HONDA
Had One Never Did Again
Happy Owners Never Drive Anything else.

HYUNDAI
Hope You Understand Nothing's Driveable And Inexpensive?

MAZDA
Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along

OLDSMOBILE
Old Ladies Driving Slowly Make Others Behind Infuriatingly Late
Everyday.
Overpriced, Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick's Irregular Leftover
Equipment

SAAB
Send Another Automobile Back

TOYOTA
Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto

VOLVO
Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object

VW
Virtually Worthless
____________________________

Frogs

A group of frogs were traveling through the woods, and two of them fell
into a deep pit. All the other frogs gathered around the pit.

When they saw how deep the pit was, they told the two frogs that they
were as good as dead. The two frogs ignored the comments and tried to
jump up out of the pit with all of their might. The other frogs kept
telling them to stop, that they were as good as dead.

Finally, one of the frogs took heed to what the other frogs were saying
and gave up. He fell down and died. The other frog continued to jump as
hard as he could. Once again, the crowd of frogs yelled at him to stop
the pain and just die. He jumped even harder and finally made it out.

When he got out, the other frogs said, "Did you not hear us?"

The frog explained to them that he was deaf. He thought they were
encouraging him the entire time.

The moral:

1. There is power of life and death in the tongue. An encouraging word
to someone who is down can lift them up and help them make it through
the day.

2. A destructive word to someone who is down can be what it takes to
kill them.

Be careful of what you say. Speak life to the power of words ---- it is
sometimes hard to understand that an encouraging word can go such a long
way.

Anyone can speak words that tend to rob another of the spirit to
continue in difficult times.

Special is the individual who will take the time to encourage another.
Be Special to others.

- Tell me and I'll forget
- Show me and I'll remember
- Involve me and I'll learn
--
_____________________________________

Joshua Li
431 S. Burnside Ave. #12 B
Los Angeles CA 90036
(323)936-8476
Permanent Email: joshli@post.harvard.edu
http://personal.anderson.ucla.edu/joshua.li/