Humor 2/28/00: Tendjewberrymud & Survival Kit

Hi everyone,

I had a great time in Boston this past weekend. The Cyberposium
conference at Harvard was awesome. They did a great job in organizing
the conference. You can see the streaming videos of the keynotes by
David Wetherell of CMGI, Jeff Bezos of Amazon, and all the panels and
workshops at www.cyberposium.com.

I also had a great time eating out with lots of friends. It happened to
be Rich Sahara and Eric Lew's birthday dinner on Saturday night, so I
was glad I was in town this weekend. After that, we went to Eric's
apartment, where we watched a movie on DVD, had dessert, and played an
UNO card game variation called Hokey Knokey. It's a lot of fun. I'm
going to buy some decks of UNO cards so I can teach my friends here in
LA how to play this. I'm going to post the pictures I took with my
digital camera on the BCEC Connections club on Yahoo. If you don't have
access to this and would like to, please let me know.

While I was in Boston, I heard from many people that their Christmas
cards to me were returned. Furthermore, the address they have for me is
correct. I think what happened is that my roommate and I both went home
for Christmas. Once our mailbox was packed, the postman returned all
our mail to the post office. They probably forgot to redeliver it, and
just returned it to the sender. Sorry about that.

This week's thought provoking question is: "If you were to be
successful in another profession, what would you want to do?"

This week's humor was forwarded by Anna Man, followed by an
inspirational story forwarded by Steve Lee.

Enjoy!

-Josh.
_________________________________________

Warning: This takes some patience to read through

Its amazing, you will understand the word on the second line by the end
of the conversation...... Read aloud for best results (and some
semblance of comprehension). "Tendjewberrymud"

Be warned, you're going to find yourself talking "funny" for a while
after reading this. This has been nominated for best email of 1999.

The following is a telephone exchange between a hotel guest and
room-service, at a hotel in Asia which was recorded and published in the
Far East Economic Review.....

Room Service (RS): "Morny. Ruin sorbees"
Guest (G): "Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service"

RS: "Rye..Ruin sorbees..morny! Djewish to odor sunteen??"
G: "Uh..yes..I'd like some bacon and eggs"

RS: "Ow July den?"
G: "What??"

RS: "Ow July den?...pry, boy, pooch?"
G: "Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry, scrambled please."

RS: "Ow July dee bayhcem...crease?"
G: "Crisp will be fine."

RS : "Hokay. An San tos?"
G: "What?"

RS:"San tos. July San tos?"
G: "I don't think so"

RS: "No? Judo one toes??"
G: "I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'judo one toes'
means."

RS: "Toes! toes!...why djew Don Juan toes? Ow bow singlish mopping we
bother?"
G: "English muffin!! I've got it! You were saying 'Toast.' Fine. Yes, an
English muffin will be fine."

RS: "We bother?"
G: "No..just put the bother on the side."

RS: "Wad?"
G: "I mean butter...just put it on the side."

RS: "Copy?"
G: "Sorry?"

RS: "Copy...tea...mill?"
G: "Yes. Coffee please, and that's all."

RS: "One Minnie. Ass ruin torino fee, strangle ache, crease baychem,
tossy singlish mopping we bother honey sigh, and copy....rye??"
G: "Whatever you say"

RS: "Tendjewberrymud"
G: "You're welcome"
____________________________

An Everyday Survival Kit:

Toothpick
Rubber band
Band-Aid
Pencil
Eraser
Chewing gum
Mint
Candy Kiss
Tea Bag

Here's why:

Toothpick - to remind you to pick out the good qualities in others.

Rubber band - to remind you to be flexible, things might not always go
the way you want, but it will work out.

Band Aid - to remind you to heal hurt feelings, yours or someone else's.

Pencil - To remind you to list your blessings everyday.

Eraser - to remind you that everyone makes mistakes, and it's okay.

Chewing gum - to remind you to stick with it and you can accomplish
anything.

Mint - to remind you that you are worth a mint to your family and
friends.

Candy Kiss - to remind you that everyone needs a kiss or a hug everyday.

Tea Bag - to remind you to relax daily and go over that list of your
blessings.
--
_____________________________________

Joshua Li
President, High Tech Business Association
14400 Addison Ave. #119
Sherman Oaks CA 91423
(818) 461-8930
Permanent Email: joshli@post.harvard.edu
http://personal.anderson.ucla.edu/joshua.li/