Humor 11/22/99: People of the 90's & Thanksgiving

Hi everyone,

Like millions of Americans, a large group of friends and I went to watch
the new James Bond movie. I really like it, but I thought the previous
movie with Michelle Yeoh, "Tomorrow Never Dies", is more action-packed
and better in general. In this movie, they were trying to develop M's
character and give Bond a more three dimensional personality.

This week's thought provoking question is: "If you could make one
fairytale or fable come true with yourself in it, which would you pick?"

This week's recommended website is: www.corbis.com. In my Strategy for
Information Industries course, we read a case study on a company that
sells stock photos to corporations. Our professor suggested this site
to check out, which I did. Corbis (owned by Bill Gates, I think),
contains millions of photos. You can search through their archives and
just browse the pictures. For example, I looked up pictures of Beijing,
since I've taken many pictures of that city myself. If you like to look
at pictures for places and peoples all over the world, this is a good
site to visit.

This week's humor was forwarded by Anna Man, followed by an
inspirational piece about Thanksgiving forwarded by Steve Lee.

Enjoy! Have a great Thanksgiving! Remember to give thanks for the
blessings over the last year.

-Josh.
_________________________________________

SIGNS THAT YOU'VE HAD TOO MUCH OF THE 90'S

1. You try to enter your password on the microwave.
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
4. You email your colleague at the desk next to you to ask "Do you wanna
go out for lunch?" and he replies "Yeah, give me 5 minutes."
5. You chat several times a day with a stranger from South America, but
you haven't spoken to your next door neighbor yet this year.
6. Your reason for not staying in touch with your friends is that they
don't have email.
7. Your idea of being organized is multicolored post-its.
8. You hear most of your jokes via email instead of in person.
9. When you go home after a long day at the office you still answer the
phone in a business manner.
10. When you make calls from home, you automatically dial "9" to get an
outside line.
11. You've sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three
different companies.
12. You really get excited about a 1.7 % pay increase.
13. Your biggest loss from a computer crash is all of your jokes.
14. It's dark when you drive to and from work, even in the summer.
15. You know exactly how many days you've got until retirement.
16. Interviewees, despite not having the knowledge or experience,
terminate the interview when told the starting salary.
17. When you see a good looking, smart person, you know it must be a
visitor.
18. Being sick is defined as not being able to walk or being in the
hospital.
19. You're already late on the assignment you just got.
20. Your boss' favorite lines are:
When you've got a few minutes...
Could you fit this in...?
...in your spare time...
When you're free...
I know you're busy, but...
21. Every week another collection envelope comes around because someone
you didn't know had started is leaving.
22. You wonder who's going to be left to put money in your 'leaving'
envelope.
23. Your family and friends describe your job as "works with
computers."
24. You only have makeup for fluorescent lighting.
25. You read this entire list nodding and smiling.
26. As you read this list, you thought about forwarding it to your
"friends you send jokes to" email group.
27. It crosses your mind that your jokes group may have seen this list
already, but you can't be bothered to check, so you forward it anyway.
____________________________

I AM THANKFUL.......

...for the taxes that I pay because it means that I am employed.
...for the mess to clean after a party because it means I have been
surrounded by friends.
...for the clothes that fit a little too snug because it means I have
enough to eat.
...for my shadow who watches me work because it means I am out in the
sunshine.
...for a lawn that needs mowing, windows that need cleaning and gutters
that need fixing because it means I have a home.
...for all the complaining I hear about government because it means we
have freedom of speech.
...for the spot I find at the far end of the parking lot because it
means I am capable of walking.
...for my huge heating bill because it means I am warm.
...for the lady behind me in church who sings off key because it means
that I can hear.
...for the piles of laundry and ironing because it means I have clothes
to wear.
...for weariness and aching muscles at the end of the day because it
means I have been productive.
...for the alarm that goes off in the early morning hours because it
means that I am alive.
...for getting too much e-mail because it lets me know I have friends
who are thinking of me.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING !!!
--
_____________________________________

Joshua Li
14400 Addison Ave. #119
Sherman Oaks CA 91423
(818)461-8930
Instant Messenger ID: joshli
Permanent Email: joshli@post.harvard.edu
http://personal.anderson.ucla.edu/joshua.li/